He's Invisible Baby!

This post is a full blown rant, so please be advised. Today was one of those days where you end up REALLY wanting to punch something...or someone. In my case, I want to punch the birth registrar at Baptist East Hospital. I received a piece of paper when I was discharged from the hospital that read "This hospital has filed for a social security card for your child. It takes about 9 weeks for us to notify the Kentucky State Department of Vital Statistics. It will take them about a week for your child's birth certificate to be accessible. Because of this, please allow up to 12 weeks for your social security card to be processed."

Great. I thought that was too good to be true. Why in the world did I ever believe that filing paperwork for a new human being would be a simple, pain free process? Henry will be 4 months on Sunday. I figured that something had to be wrong because this is obviously well past the 12 week period. I began to worry because it is quickly approaching January...that means TAX TIME. Without a social security card and number, we can't claim Henry on our taxes. I hate to think that I am one of those parents that associates TAX DEDUCTION and BABY, but dammit, I want what I am entitled to.

Here's the scoop. After HOURS of calling the Social Security offices in Louisville, all 2 of them, I was finally able to determine that the hospital NEVER FILED for the Social Security Card. This scared me. If they had not filed for the card, what else did they say they were going to do...then didn't? I was able to get the application process for the Social Security Card started, I had to have his birth certificate, verification of birth statement and a pediatrician issued immunization record certificate. My aunt came in to take me to Frankfort since I only have Mondays off. We wanted to get this taken care of as soon as possible since we were already getting such a late start.

So we stopped past Henry's pediatrician and picked up the immunization certificate. I had the verification of birth statement. I figured that getting his birth certificate would be easy. HA! Boy was I wrong. Not only did Frankfort NOT have his birth certificate, they had no record of Baptist East even submitting ANY information about his birth. According to the sate, the baby is NON-EXISTENT!

I can tell you right now, spending close to $9000 on health care and medical bills for a NON-EXISTENT baby seems kind of foolish, so I kindly (not so kindly) called Baptist East from Frankfort and informed them of this. They were extremely clueless as to what happened, and offered me their sincerest apologies. That's fine and dandy, but that isn't going to get my aunt her gasoline and time back. They said " well, it says here that it was entered into the computer. I don't know what happened after that." They referred me to a woman who works for the Kentucky Department of Health, who apparently forwards (and is apparently crappy at her job) all the information on the birth certificate to Frankfort. Seems to me, this is a middle-man position and the freaking HOSPITAL should be responsible for this to prevent confusion.

Of course I called this woman, and there was no answer. I left 2 messages on her machine, I am sure that by the second message she probably doesn't wan to call me back. I am generally nice, but when it comes to personal information about someone (more specifically MY BABY) that cannot be accounted for, I do tend to get pissed. I get even MORE PISSED when I am ignored. A simple explanation was all I was asking for.

What does all of this mean? The obvious answer to this question is that I have no record of my son ever being born. I have no birth certificate, no social security card. Nothing. All of the paperwork I have from the hospital is apparently a formality, because NONE of the documents I was given can be used to apply for any government issued documents. I have a non-existent 4 month old.

This also means that it is almost December and that it will take up to 3 weeks for them to prove he was born, another 2 weeks for that to be sent to the Kentucky Department of Health, another week for that to register with Vital Statistics and another week for that information to arrive in my mailbox in from of a birth certificate. My child will be almost 5 months old before the state recognizes that he is a real baby! Too damn bad the insurance companies already recognize him!

What I have learned. I have learned that you should never, ever trust that bureaucracy will serve you well. I should have trusted my gut instinct when I left the hospital and filed for everything I needed on my own. Afterall, the birth registrar misspelled my name twice, and could not explain any of the paperwork to me in English. She was Indian. Nothing against that, but the hospital should have someone on staff that can explain things clearly to you when you ask. She kept saying "How do you say" and "I don't know." Only one piece of paper that I received from the hospital was self- explanatory, and that was the above mentioned piece about when I would receive his social security card. Even that was a bust!

All in all, I am very tired and frustrated that I had to haul Henry so far for nothing. I could have spent that day enjoying my time with him and not worrying about if the state even acknowledges his birth. I did have a great time with my aunt though. We always have fun on our increasingly pointless adventures. Enough about that. I will just sit back and wait for either Baptist East or the Kentucky Department of Health to screw something up again....on to happier thoughts.

Since I can't get away with not posting a new picture of Henry, here is the newest one that I have of him. This was taken on Thanksgiving at "Uncle Aarons" Henry was amused by the rather large ornaments that they put on their 15 foot tree!



That's all for now,

Try it! You'll like it!

Henry is quickly approaching 4 months (hard to believe I know) so I have been practicing making different kinds of babyfood in my Beaba Babycook. I was concerned that consistency would be an issue, either I would have a whole bunch of food that is too thick...or too thin. However, the Babycook takes care of that. After you steam the veggies and fruit, the water drains off into a separate container, you can then add that water back into the puree to the desired consistency. Simple! Today I made winter squash and sweet potatoes. I gave the sweet potatoes to my friend Heather for her little boy. I can't wait until Henry can eat them!








Here is the recipe for Winter Squash
I LOVE this recipe because its a great way to get fresh tasting squash post growing season. (yes, I tasted it.)
1tbsp. olive oil
1 8-oz bag of frozen, precut winter squash
Water, breastmilk or formula for thinning to desired consistency.

Preheat oven to 400*
In a large bowl, combine squash and olive oil. Coat completely.
Place on a large baking sheet
Roast for 20 minutes until tender. Puree in food processor.
Add desired amount of formula, breastmilk, or water until desired consistency is achieved!

This is a simple recipe! It's even easier for me because I don't have to roast the veggies in the oven, I simply place the squash in the Babycook and add water! LOVE IT!

In other news!

Henry has made the transition into cloth diapers. We are diapering 100% in cloth while we are at home....and have even made short trips out while in cloth. I have to wait for my wetbag to arrive before we can take longer trips. I will post pics of his new diapers in a few, they are currently in the dryer!

Here are some more pictures from the past week! Hopefully I won't go so long without updating again!


Henry had a visitor today! Benjamin (and Heather too!) came in from Lexington to visit us. We were SO happy they made it in. We hope they can move back to Louisville soon. Last time Henry and Benjamin were together, Henry wasn't even a week old!

Nanny sent Henry a hat today in the mail! She is the best nanny ever!

Henry made a new friend this week. Met Yot. He lives in a pot! (A character from Dr. Seuss's There's a Wocket in my Pocket!
That's all for now~

Playtime!

I love that Henry is getting to the age where independence is fun for him. Meaning that he has something to do! Before, all he could do is lay around and stare at the ceiling, mobile, or mommy. Now, he can grab things, sit and jabber at himself or even watch t.v. We recently bought him an activity gym, and I think it was a great investment!


That's all for now!

Watch me Grow!

Henry will be 4 months old in a little over 2 weeks. It is hard to believe how fast time flies! It seems like he has been here forever.
Here are some pictures that REALLY show how much he has grown!



Bath time! 2 weeks old!


Bath time! 2 months old!


Bouncy chair! 1 month old!


Bouncy chair! 3.5 months old!

Zoo Day!

Today we had breakfast at mi restaurante favorita, casa de la waffle (waffle house) and went to the Louisville zoo. We didn't get to stay as long as we would have liked because of the cold, but we still had a great time. It was really nice to not have to battle all of the other moms with strollers to catch a glimpse of some of my favorite animals. Matt, Henry and I were the only people there besides a field trip from Farnsley Middle School. We got there at noon, which was a great time because they were feeding all of the animals. We actually saw a lion roar! She stood up on a rock and was evidently voicing her disapproval of today's menu. Too bad that I got "Hakuna Matatta" stuck in my head for the rest of the afternoon. Henry was all snuggled in his fleece sleeper and had an extra warm blanket on top of him. Of course, he slept the whole time. We are looking forward to the spring when he might start showing an interest, or at least staying awake for part of the trip! Here are some photos from our big day.

xoxo
M&D&H

Mealtime with Henry.

Milestones milestones! Last week he started holding his head up and this week he is on the track toward his first solid food. We started rice cereal! Just a tiny little bit. We made it really thin and served it to him with a spoon. I decided to not go the "cereal in bottle" route because it encourages overeating. I wanted to wait until he was 4 months, but he was taking almost 7 ounces of milk at one sitting. That is not normal for a 3 month old. He has also started waking in the middle of the night for a feeding, which is kind of an inconvenience for this working mommy. Sorry if that sounds selfish, but between the teething and night feedings, I'm flat out exhausted. Besides, I pride myself on the fact that he was sleeping through the night at 7 weeks of life! We tried an extra feeding for a few weeks, then added 2 ounces to his feedings. That worked for awhile and it's ok when it is breastmilk, but 7 ounces of formula for such a little guy makes me nervous. It's SO fattening and regardless of what anyone says, the iron in formula stops my kid up. He never had problems with constipation UNTIL I started supplementing with formula. Babies don't even need iron supplementation until around 6 months of age, when there iron stores are depleted. I'm not a doctor, so I guess my opinion really doesn't matter. :)
Here are some pictures from Henry's big day.





And a video!

I Wrote this a Few Months Back...

Over the past 9 months I have grown as a person. Literally. Through the wonderful winding roads of pregnancy I have discovered that it is more of a time for self discovery than any other time in a woman's life. Unless of course, a more experienced woman would argue that menopause would take the cake, but really, do you want to take cake from me at this point?

Discovery Number 1: Hormones, Wondrous Hormones.

Simply stated for the smart folks as "a chemical released by a cell in one part of the body of an organism that sends out messages that affect cells in other parts of the organism." Lie. This should clearly read: "A chemical released by a cell in one part of the body of an organism that sends out messages that affect everyone within 2 feet of said organism. Negatively."

Hormones are responsible for the most unpleasant parts of pregnancy. Whether it be the "zero to raging bitch in 60 seconds days" or the senseless crying over your husband buying the "tissues without lotion" on accident. Hormones make your daily life miserable. Hands down. There is nothing you can do to stop it either. My suggestion is that if you feel that your spouse is not understanding, patient and ready to deal with 9+ months of total and outright bullshit, I would make plans to discuss the division of your assets ASAP.

I am lucky enough to be blessed with a wonderful, compassionate and understanding husband who, through all my moments of anger, rage, tears and hyperventilation, somehow saw the hilarity in it all. Although, that made me even more angry at the time.

Discovery Number 2: I Hate Cell Phones.

I remember getting my first cell phone at 17. Calling everyone while sitting NEXT to the home phone in my bedroom. Somehow it was just cooler. Then came text messaging, What? Why actually TALK to someone when you can send little abbreviated messages that are something like ignorant codes that you can spend 5 minutes deciphering!?

Nowadays, I feel like I am totally and completely dependent on my cell phone and it sucks. No better way to give everyone 100% access to you 100% of the time than a cell phone. A glorious, little lighted rectangle that completely controls you. Consumes you. ANNOYS YOU. No matter what ringtone you choose, text message alert you choose, volume level you choose, it is still there. Beeping!, dinging! and ringing! Ready to disrupt your MUCH NEEDED NAP or better yet, break from humanity. I know what you are thinking, "Why don't you just turn it off." "HAHA" I say to my dear friends. Have you met my family? Cops would be on my porch in less than 3 hours if I didn't answer my phone. A) because I have PROBABLY gone into labor and didn't tell anyone. Meaning that I have somehow managed to drive myself to the hospital on my own. Or B) I have fallen down the stairs, slipped in the kitchen, gotten stuck under the bed, you name it. The irrational and worrisome thoughts of a Carman are endless. Trust me. I often find myself thinking them. Henry will love this when he and his friends are out driving and I call to make sure that his shoelaces are tied tight so they don't get wrapped around the brake pedal. (This is an actual comment from my grandmother upon getting into the car to drive for the first time on my own.)

Rest assured, I generally try to answer my phone when I hear it and I generally enjoy hearing from people every now and again. If I hear it and still don't answer it, you hung up before I could get my fat ass off the chair to answer it.....and that is NOT my fault. You should not be so impatient and hang up so quickly. "Just put the phone next to the chair, isn't that the most sensible thing to do?" Sensible is not, and has not been on the agenda since this reverse effect tapeworm took residence in my belly. <3

Discovery Number 3: Irrational Fears.

I was told that this never goes away, that it comes with being a mom. However, I would like to think that the intensity of these fears will at least subside. Last irrational fear? Not having enough socks. Keep in mind, my baby is due in August. I woke up in a cold sweat in the middle of the night crying because I didn't have any baby socks. This somehow lead me to believe that I was the worst parent on the planet. Case and point, these thoughts and fears obviously have an underlying meaning. I mean, it's not like I am going to be responsible for another human being or anything. The reality is that your brain has to prepare you somehow, and crazy thoughts are the best way I suppose. Thanks brain.

Discovery Number 4: Stranger Danger.

Being pregnant somehow entitles every Tom, Dick and Harry....or I should say Mary, Martha and Agnes the right to ask you a long list of personal questions. I should also add that being pregnant also gives complete and total strangers the right to touch you. Let me repeat that. TOUCH YOU. Never in my life have I feared going to the supermarket for fear of being asked about my weight, swollen feet or bulging belly. Only once since my pregnancy has an adorable old woman understood what personal space was and simply asked "when I was due" and simply added, "I think you look beautiful." I could have scooped her up with a spoon. If everyone acted like that, it would certainly be a fun ego boost. However, it is the other rude ass, nosy women who just want to compare you to their daughters, nieces, daughter-in-laws and Cat that I have a problem with. Yes, I said cat. Some creepy lady said that I should not be driving alone because her cat at home carried as low as me and gave birth early. Case and point, nothing in life can prepare you for the amount of attention a pregnant body receives. For me, it is not welcomed. I have NEVER liked to state the "weekly state of my cervix" to total strangers and I have certainly NEVER liked to have my belly rubbed like a Buddha statue in the dairy isle at Meijer. I don't even like people I know to touch my stomach without asking. It is PERSONAL SPACE. Leave it alone!

Discovery Number 5: Mother Gorilla Syndrome Is NOT a Joke.

Right now, I am in my last weeks of pregnancy. I want nothing more than to be "un-pregnant" and be able to see and hold my son. However, upon reflecting on that statement, that means that other people can SEE and HOLD my son, and that sends me into a nervous panic. What? Others will want to touch my baby?! No, he's mine! I will not share! They cannot be in tune to his every need or be able to know what his cries mean......after all they LET HIM CRY!!! Yes, these are all very real thoughts that have crossed my mind. I know they are totally unwarranted, but unless you have been pregnant there is really no way of explaining it. I know that it is totally healthy and that with time they will pass. I can say though that these thoughts rise and fall with the sun...and are either heightened or diminished with daily conversations and comments. The fact that I will be returning to work....starting a new job on top of that in a few short weeks after he is born is not helping my mind ease these thoughts. So for future reference no one should ever say things to me like "We will take him to the zoo when it gets cooler while you are at work." or make jokes about how mama doesn't have to know." Yes. Mama does have to know. Mama has to know every sound, movement, coo, cry, poop and pee her baby makes. I already feel like I am giving up a lot so let's not rub it in.

Discovery Number 6: Kids Really Are Expensive.

When we first found out that we were pregnant, Matt and I totally and completely freaked out and didn't tell anyone. Not because we were about to be responsible for another human being, but because we had JUST browsed the baby section at Target just WEEKS before for a baby shower gift for a friend. We were dead set on not having kids and made fun of the ridiculously high prices for useless crap like swaddling blankets, bottle warmers, and whatever the hell a "sleep sheep" is. Anyway, to that I say ♫Instant Karma's gonna get you!♫

We were more concerned with not being able to afford nice things that we really couldn't relish in the moment of finding out that we were actually going to be parents. I found out I was pregnant at the doctor's office. I made an appointment because I had heartburn that radiated from my toes. I wanted Nexium, but settled with a prescription for prenatal vitamins. How sweet, our first expense! $45 dollar vitamins that actually cost $52 by time you buy the Colace to offset the wonderful side effects.

Anyway. This discovery comes with a little life lesson. You will NEVER have enough money for a kid. If you wait until you feel that you are "financially stable" you will be dead and the stability is being divided from your estate. Kids need love and affection more than they need a Broyhill "Life Stages" crib or a High Yield savings account before the age of 3. I never had either of those things, and I turned out just fine. (Granted Henry already has the latter, but I'm sorry, I will be paying for my own college education until I am 40, I don't recommend it.) I wish I would have cherished the moment I found out I was going to be a mom instead of trying not to think about it for fear that I couldn't afford it.

I will try to remember that over the next few weeks. I DREAD the hospital bills. The savings we worked so hard to build up over the past 5 years is rather puny. I haven't even paid off the prenatal care yet and I am weeks, if not days away from delivering. Oh well. Such is the life of an American. Health care or food right? I am sure that for all the troubles I have encountered while being pregnant, once it is over I will miss it. Pregnancy is such a unique experience, and to say that I survived it will certainly warrant an addition to my "list of things that I never knew I could do list." Here's hoping for a speedy delivery of a beautiful, happy and healthy baby.

William Henry Young

August 5, 2010

4:56 p.m

6lbs. 12ozs.

Updating...It's Happening Here!

Hello Friends and Family! I will be posting pictures and updating about Henry on this blog. It is by invitation only. I get really tired of people and their parenting criticisms on Facebook, so I have decided to start blogging again. It is really fun, and a neat way to preserve memories. Look for more posts in the days and weeks to come.
Chau!
M&D&H